Get into car, start vacation

Published in the Friday, May 30, 1986 Salt Lake Tribune

By Kathy Hunsaker

School will be ending soon, and as a teacher, I will miss the little faces (with bits of scrambled egg stuck to the chin) and the smiles of adoration that come from 8-year-old children who think you're wonderful.  There are, however, things I won't be missing as June rolls around. These include:

1. Transformers. Everything turns into something  else nowadays.  Watches turn into robots, cars into watches, calculators into cars, teachers into crazed toy picker uppers. 

2.  Little people reporting stolen goods to me.  "He took my pencil."  "Someone stole my lunch."  "My watch/calculator/model car has been stolen."  These items have never been misplaced-- there is always a criminal charge made.

3.  Hands covered with pen marks, Magic Marker lines, chalk dust, ditto machine smudges.  I'm talking about my own hands. 

4. Being locked in a room with 27 children during a rainy recess when they'd schedule an important baseball game.  Not a pretty sight. 

5.  Walking 2 1/2 miles to the office to get a phone call from someone who hung up because he had to wait too long.

6.  Bickering, fighting, pushing, shoving, hitting, kicking, pinching and slapping.  I know teachers only have 30 minutes for lunch, but this behavior in the faculty room can really grate on your nerves!

7.  Deciphering writing that could stump the most efficient CIA, FBI, IRS agent! I've tried mirrors, magnifying glasses and my magical decoder ring and there are still samples of writing that I have yet to unravel. 

Overused, Abused

8. Doing six things at once, even though I've become very adept to eating a sandwich, answering a question, checking a paper, settling a dispute, writing a note to a parent and putting up a bulletin board at the same time. 

9.  Parent-teacher conference.  These are in the evening after a day of school in our district. (Not by my choice of course!) By 4, my brain has been used, overused and abused and has checked out for the day.  It's tough to try and deliver a professional, well thought out evaluation of a child's progress when your mouth is working without the aid of the brain, the stomach growling, the head is pounding and the eyelids are drooping. 

10.  Giving orders.  It takes me almost a month each summer to stop talking to my husband like he'd a third grader.  "Get your shoes on.  Tuck your shirt in.  I want you to be quiet.  Line up at the door with your arms folded and let's get into that car and start this vacation!" 

Happy Summer!

Kathy Hunsaker, besides teaching third grade, likes embroidery, reading, photography and collecting humorous tapes for her answering machine.

Don't worry, Mother: there's time for sleep when the children are grown

This was published in the Friday, October 25, 1991 Salt Lake Tribune.          

      I have two well behaved, adorable children: ages 3 ½ and 1 ½.

                They do what they are told, clean up their toys, stay right by my side at the mall and never throw a tantrum when things don’t go their way.

                Unfortunately, they were both switched at birth (imagine the odds against this!).  Somewhere my real girls are sleeping through the night and their “parents” are waking up after eight uninterrupted  hours of sleep to get their little ones dressed in clothes that will stay clean more than 15 minutes.

                Meanwhile, I am taking care of two active, real children, who conspire against me to make sure I never really sleep or rest again.  Oh sure, I’m a better person for this.  Hey, I can live on 15 minutes of sleep.  Sleep I got standing over the sink listening to the garbage disposal consume the meal my children didn’t. 

                It’s not that my children are worse than others.  It’s not that I have more problems than other mothers.  It’s just that being a parent of any children not made out of cardboard is tough.  One million times I’ve looked at my husband and said, “What were they thinking of?”

                Seven years of luxurious selfish childless marriage come to mind.  One million times he’s put his hand to his ear and said, “What did you say?  I can’t hear anything over the spoon banging on the plate.”

                My children are probably no different from yours.  They don’t eat what they should and beg for what they shouldn’t have.  They cry, they scream, they scream, they carry on.  They wake up at night, they get their ear infections on all major holidays and have never yet missed an opportunity to throw up when we have a babysitter.

                I spend my days with my girls.  I wrestle my baby to the floor to get her dressed, chase her to wipe her nose.  I pick up the same toys 300 times a day.  I have not really been in an upright position in years.  I have this baby who translates the word “no” to mean “try again harder.”  Both children challenge me.  My younger runs into the street and looks over her shoulder as to say, “Come on I double dare you to catch me.”  My 3 year old brags that she’s tougher than I.  (She may be.  I’m weak from sleep deprivation!)

                As a mother of toddlers, I spend time playing with my children.  My 3 year old likes to pretend and since her sister doesn’t know the rules of the game yet, I’m her partner.  The list of people and things I’ve pretended to be this month is incredible.

                “Pretend you’re Susan, Lisa’s mom, and I’m Lisa,” she’ll say.  “Pretend you’re grandpa.  Pretend you’re Dave, Susan’s husband and Lisa’s Dad.”  I get so confused.  I can’t remember who I am.  The other day she had me Susan, Lisa’s mom and Dave’s wife, sitting on the front steps singing, “I’m waiting for Lisa to come home, come home” to the tune of who knows what.  And my mind has lost so many brain cells since I had children that I did it!  And there were four construction workers outside next door, mind you.

                I saw them shake their heads, roll their eyes and make gagging mouth gestures.  In the last two weeks, I’ve had to pretend I was also her pre-school teacher, a fireman, policeman, a swimming pool and even Jesus.

                “Jesus, this is my swing set,” she said as she took me on a yard tour.  “There are our tomato plants…”  The real test came the other day when she asked me (no, told me) to pretend I was her real mom.  That was a tough assignment.

                My smaller one, affectionately called the beast, is into the tantrum stage.  She has turned into the child “I’d never have.”  You know the things we used to say our children would never do.

                “My child will never go out in dirty clothes.  My child will never hit other children.  My child will never crawl across the entire distance of the Sandy Post Office on her stomach with her mouth on the germ ridden floor!  (The last example was purely fictional- my child would never do that.)  She has a set of lungs an opera singer would covet, tears the size of olives and a will stronger than iron.  It’s these kinds of challenges that have had me to the conclusion that someone else has my real children and I’ve got theirs.

                All kidding aside, I love being a mother.  I wouldn’t trade my girls for the world.  I love hearing them laugh when Mommy trips over the garden hose, chasing one away from the street and the other out of the driver’s seat of the car. 

                I love hearing the new words they learn…”Go away” and “No way” being the only ones we can print here.  I love the dandelions they pick and mash up for me to eat.  I love the baths I give them and the way I slide across the bathroom floor when we’re finished.  I love watching the news being rebroadcast at 3 a.m. while I’m rocking one of them.  But I also love their sun-tanned little arms around my neck and the “I love yous” and the giggles and the grins and their sweet baby snoring when I check them at night.

                You know what? Maybe they are my real children!  I think I’ll keep them. I can always sleep when they’re grown up and don’t need me anymore.

                

Ram Awards

From Ruth:  Holly, Don’t know if you already have this.  Your mom wrote it when we had a principal that gave awards constantly & interrupted classes.  She made a difficult time funny.  Enjoy, Ruth.

Thanks Ruth!  I remember my mom writing this, but never had the copy!

Teachers,

                In our ever increasing effort to reward all behavior, we have decided that that following ram awards will be awarded daily.  Please note that these are in addition to, not in lieu of, the ram of the year, month, week, day, hour and minute.  Please turn in your names by 9:13 a.m. each morning.  Announcements to call the winners will be made at random times throughout the day.  Please send your winners to the appropriate area at that time for interviews, photographs, and in some cases, fingerprinting.

Ram Awards

Ram Reader

Morning Ram

Afternoon Ram

Recess Ram

Ram Eater (lunchroom winner)

Transition Ram

Rim Ram (Basketball)

Rem Ram (sleeping in class)

Rom Ram (computer lab)

Ram-bunctious (“active” child)

Dodge Ram (after school parking lot)

Ram Rider (bus award)

Restroom Ram (for appropriate restroom behavior)

Ram-bo (fighting and intimidating other students)

Rude Ram (this may include students, staff, parents, or anyone who works at the district office)

Running of the Ram (hallway award)

And of course, for the real dilly…

Rama-Rama ding dong

Kathy's Obituary

Kathy Eccles Hunsaker 1951 ~ 2007 Kathy Eccles Hunsaker passed away peacefully surrounded by her family on Sat., Feb. 17, 2007. She battled health problems for the last few months, yet waited to know that her girls were taken care of before she left this life. Born September 7, 1951, the first of five children, to Blaine and Gerrie (Billings) Eccles in Salt Lake City, Utah. Even as a small child her mother knew that she would someday become a teacher. Kathy loved to take care of others, and even had a nursery school for the neighborhood children when she was very young. She was also blessed with a wonderful sense of humor and never failed to make people laugh. Kathy graduated from Edina High School (Edina, Minnesota) in 1969, and then continued her education at the University of Utah, majoring in Elementary Education. She then began her teaching career, touching more children's lives than anyone can imagine. She married Dana Hunsaker in 1981 and was later divorced. After wanting a child for several years she was finally able to give birth to her first daughter, Jennifer, in 1987. Two years later she was blessed with her second daughter, Holly. She lived her whole life for her girls. After several years she continued her teaching career and ended it at Redwood Elementary. She was a very humorous writer and even had some of her work published. Even in her last days she was still able to make people laugh. She touched the hearts of everyone she met. Her personality pulled people toward her and she had a way of making a complete stranger feel like a friend. Kathy is survived by her beautiful, incredibly brave daughters, Jennifer and Holly Hunsaker; loving parents, Gerrie and Blaine Eccles; her special aunt and uncle, Marilyn and Jay Fellows; sisters, Vickie (Jeff) Arnell, Karen (Terry) Noorda, Pamela (Brad) Watkins; brother, Rob Eccles; and her loving extended family. She is also survived by her many close friends, including her best friend of over 30 years, Kim Babcock. Preceded in death by her grandparents, uncle and dear mother-in-law. Funeral services will be held Thurs., February 22nd at 11:00 a.m. at the Sandy Mount Jordan Stake Center, 9331 S. 300 E. Sandy, UT. A viewing will be held Wednesday evening from 6-8 p.m. at Memorial Mortuary, 5850 S. 900 E. and one hour prior to services at the church. Interment, Wasatch Lawn Memorial Park. The family wishes to thank the surgeons and ICU team at St. Marks Hospital, especially our angel, Anna; the staff at Promise Specialty Hospital, and Salt Lake Regional Medical Center ICU team; the faculty, staff and students of Redwood Elementary and all those who have given love and support. In lieu of flowers a trust fund has been set up for Kathy's girls at Cyprus Credit Union. We love you and know that you will always be with us!

Sorry for the delay...but here's another!

This was a letter from my mom when I went to Oakcrest Girls Camp.  It was postmarked June 7, 2003.

                Well, How’s it going?  I think everything is OK here, but there was a time when I wasn’t so sure.  I decided to clean out my closet and there was an unfortunate incident where I got locked out in there!  I was a little upset at first, but I felt better after a 2 hour nap.  That’s when I remembered that doorknobs turn from the inside too!

                I hope it’s going well there.  Jen felt so jealous about you getting to go & be a “camper” that she started to dress in camping clothes.  She’s insisting she use a flashlight instead of lights and last night she went for a hike around the yard.  I’ve had to out my foot down though when she wanted to start a campfire in the living room & use her special camping toilet!

                                I need to go now.  Jennifer wants to sing a few camping songs and roast marshmallows of what used to be our fence.  Plus, I think Jim is stalking us again so we will have to roast an extra marshmallow for him.

                Say hello to everyone for me.  (Well not everyone- I don’t even know that girl over there!)  We’ll see you before you know it!

                I’ll pray at 10:30 (OK- maybe 10:29 or 10:31, but hey- no one’s perfect!)

                                                I love you lots-

                                                                Love,

                                                                    Mom

Let's start with a good one!

This is a letter my mom wrote to me when I was at Oakcrest Girls Camp.  I am not sure of the exact date, but it was postmarked June 9, 2003.

Dear Holly,

                How’s it going?  Things are OK here.  It Is just a little bit crowded with the people I let rent your room here, but we’re adjusting.  I told them not to put all 4 kids in your bed, but they insisted they liked to be close.  I was a little concerned about the one boy who wets the bed, but it turns out he slept on top.  I just wish they’d remembered to put a diaper on the baby!  (Sorry- as I always say “It will come out in the wash!”)  The good news is that we found some super glue to glue the porcelain dolls back together.  You can hardly tell they were broken.

                Jen’s been busy.  She was going to clean her room, but decided to just move the clothes to the living room.  It’s a little crowded in there.

                Snoopy is causing us problems.  He’s decided to pierce both of his ears and get s tongue ring!  I’ve put up with him inviting every cat in the neighborhood over for ice cream, taking my checkbook to buy cat toys that he never cleans up and his hogging of the remote control, but to pierce his body parts without checking around for the best price 1st!...Well, that’s the final straw!

                Nothing much else is going on here- oh yeah- I almost forgot.  We won $5,000 of candy and a new Winnebago, so we took a trip around the country and ate ourselves silly.  I hope you aren’t too jealous!  I also made a few personal changes… I got hair extensions (purple!) had a face life, got a Michael Jackson nose job, learned to speak Chinese and tried out for American Idol-Senior Citizen Version! I feel like a new person.

                I love you & miss you.  Jen sends her love.  Snoopy sends something, but with the darn tongue ring I can’t understand a darn thing he says!

See you soon!

Love,

                                                                                   Mom